Come on Man? Go Get a room!

I came to Starbucks today in search of a place outside of my house to write and still be warm. I thought about riding my mountain bike today, but I must admit that the cold weather makes me a little lethargic. I went to the garage and began pulling my bike out then I thought to myself, hey you are never gonna finish any writing project if during your times where you can write you just go ride your bike. (At least that is what I am going to claim.) So, I ran one errand for my wife and then I drove to the local Starbucks around the corner from the house.

I got out of my car and was greeted with two people sucking face. Two very large people sucking face. When I say sucking, I mean they didn't come up for air, ever. If mouth to mouth was still part of doing CPR I would think that he was trying to revive the poor girl. She was sitting in the front seat of the car and he was on one knee in full on make out mode. They continued while I walked across the parking lot and passed the car. I was sitting there thinking, "Really, at least the back of your head looks like that of an adult." I walked in ordered my hot chocolate looked out the window and saw the car was still there and they were still there in going at it. I began to think I should probably get my watch out and put a timer on it. Or, I could pull my iPhone out and discreetly take a picture or even better a video of the event going down in the Starbucks parking lot. Then, I looked and saw he was a pretty good sized dude so I better keep the iPhone put away. Well, I got my Hot Chocolate and realized as I was going to find a place to sit down that the car was gone. I was kinda disappointed. I wanted to see the super kissers in person.

It reminded me of the first young couples even Marge and I attended after we got married. I don't think anyone who reads this blog was attending that event but I could be wrong. If it brings back memories that are not so, I apologize in advance. We were attending this church that had an amazing young couples group. You could tell they all cared about each other and had real community amongst them. We showed up and enjoyed the food. (Which by the way is probably the second most important part of any good church event, first being the presence of God, and yes that is a pastor answer.) Then they began to play some games that were fun but geared at couples. I really don't remember most of them. I just remember one, The Kissing Contest. I am sorry, but as important as food is to as church event, kissing is probably just as important a church event killer. I don't care if you are married. Trust me, it isn't because I don't enjoy kissing my wife. In fact, I hope everyone enjoys kissing their spouse as much as I enjoy kissing mine. I just don't want to see people kissing others for a prolonged period of time. Well, that was the game. They lined up all the couples and said, "On your mark, get set, go!" Everyone except my wife and I commenced kissing. We just kind of stood there in awe of the situation in disbelief. I knew we had no chance at winning this game because my wife just starts laughing when she has to give me a peck when we are in front of people. Then, we got to the last couples, lets just say none of us wanted to see them kissing. It is a picture scarred in my brain forever. I just believe anything longer than two seconds belongs in private. Here is a list of times it is appropriate for prolonged kissing in public:

1. End of your Wedding (I think it may even be considered cuter if it is just a peck in this case.)
2. When a spouse comes home from a long time gone (i.e. soldiers coming home from war, coming home from a missions trip, etc.)
3. If you are an Aggie, then after they score a touchdown, but only if you are an Aggie.
4. When you win millions in the lottery. If you kiss more than a peck in public after you win a $2 on a scratch off you need to be punched in the face.

I think that is about it. I hope you french kiss your spouse daily, but just do it where we can't see it. I know the Bible says greet em with a Holy kiss. Just keep your spit to yourself. I understand this entry today is probably not my most pastoral but, every once and a while some of us just need to be reminded. Come on man? Get a Room!

Wait, I still didn't get any book writing done and I need to go pick up the kids. Should have rode my bike.